Hello internet friends,

have you seen the new Star Wars, yet? Do you have an opinion? Turns out you’re not alone on the internet. (Obviously I also have opinions, so here we go.)
Funnily enough almost everything I really liked made the peanerd gallery mad. Which obviously tells me that I am right, because they are wrong.

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Konbanwa

(I know that not a single one of you cares, but ¯\ _(ツ)_/¯ )

The new season of Terrace House started. It will take a couple of weeks to see how the new folks are, but so far it looks great. Terrace House, the nicest reality show on television, heads back to Japan

Maps

I hardly ever use Google Maps these days. It’s too resource intensive on my desktop computer (Which is only a pricey MacBook Pro with all the RAM, not that I’m complaining or anything.) and on my phone Apple Maps is good enough. But maybe I should go back: Google Maps’s Moat – How far ahead of Apple Maps is Google Maps? – it is fascinating to read what they do and how they do it.

Potter

We can’t really trust JK Rowling anymore because internet justice (google it yourself.) so maybe we can replace her with a robot? The first draft sounds pretty promising: ‘He began to eat Hermione’s family’: bot tries to write Harry Potter book – and fails in magic ways

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Toodles!

Hello internet friends,

what a lovely Monday it is!
Let’s just pretend it is Monday, okay?

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Robot News

We all know that robots will come for our jobs. But won’t someone please think of the children? Will Robots Take Our Children’s Jobs?
Well, I don’t know what jobs your children have, but maybe let them be children for a while?

But maybe your children have the very questionable job of bullying homeless people? In that case, yes, they’ll be redundant, soon: Robots are being used to shoo away homeless people in San Francisco
Just look at this thing, with cute stickers of animals. San Francisco sounds like a great place.

Spider News

But hey, if the robots take all our jobs, maybe humans can find a new purpose on this planet: as spider food! If spiders worked together, they could eat all humans in a year

lol. maybe.

This made me chuckle: The InDev Incident

This also made me chuckle: Best Of 2017: PODCASTS

This made everybody chuckle already, but you know, it is pretty funny: I Made My Shed the Top Rated Restaurant On TripAdvisor

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So… see you again next Monday. Ehem.
Toodles!

Hello internet friends,

just FYI: Why Dating An Entrepreneur Is Very Different To The Norm (And if you want to turn into a stabby human you’ll google the original article.)

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Robot Thoughts

As robots – or at least voice activated assistants are becoming more prevalent, something is noticable: they’re all coded female. (Obviously this is not only a problem for women who share the same name as these things, it is also problematic in itself. And yes, yes, I know it is possible to switch Siri to a male voice, but who changes defaults anyway?) As you know, Bob, I linked to the sexual harassment test before and the results were, well, they were what was to be expected.
So Sarah Cooper decided to collect a few better responses to what is a pretty dumb request already: OK Google, Show Me Your Tits

Paintings

One of the best YouTube channels around is Every Frame a Painting and now Taylor Ramos and Tony Zhou are done with it. They were nice enough to share why and what they learned while editing these videos: Postmortem: Every Frame a Painting

Evolution News

Usually there aren’t many newsworthy things about evolution. Only numbnuts think it doesn’t exist and if we can see it happen it is usually with bacteria and other un-fun things. But now! News! A new bird has arrived: A New Bird Species Has Evolved on Galapagos And Scientists Watched It Happen

Hype Train

Next week is already new Star Wars week and maybe you have plans to watch it right away and feel a bit confused about what happened so far. But don’t worry, io9 is here to help: A Timeline of Everything We Know Happened After Return of the Jedi, Up to The Last Jedi

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Be nice to your robots, folks. Maybe then they’ll have mercy and kill you quick and painless once the uprising begins.
Toodles!

Hello internet friends,

you’re welcome: ibless.therains.downin.africa
(But why?)

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De Chelonian Mobile

Oh, how lovely: The art of Terry Pratchett’s Discworld – in pictures
(Before we get into discussions: It’s Paul Kidby, not Josh Kirby. They’re both amazing in their very different ways.)

Social

I still remember when Web 2.0 became Social Media and all of us started to worry. And we probably all agree: The End of the Social Era Can’t Come Soon Enough
Let the idiots play with their bitcoin and SEO get-rich-quick schemes and maybe we can go back to personal blogs and uh… tag clouds and opinions about RSS.

Dogs!

These may be the world’s first images of dogs—and they’re wearing leashes.
This is rather amazing. Turns out dogs have domesticated the ape for a lot longer than we knew.

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That’s all folks – after you’re done reading, why not read some Science Fiction, watch a western or listen to some classical music.

Toodles!

Hello internet friends,

it’s Monday and what a fine day it is to think about art. And because everything has to be a listicle, let’s get right to it: All the Da Vincis in the world: rated

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Analog News

I’m not quite sure I can totally agree with this guy but sure, he has quite a lot of points: Our Love Affair With Digital Is Over
That being said: oh boy, do I still like digital, too. How else would I reach you folks? You bet I wouldn’t type these out on a typewriter (I do still have one) while listening to music on vinyls (I don’t have a record player) and taking photos with a 35mm camera. (I have… multiple. Almost as many as digital cameras.)

Machine Learning

Have you ever heard of MENACE? Turns out it is a machine learning machine from the 1950s and it is awesome: Machine Learning Explained
And if you actually read through the whole thing, congratulations. How about a fifteen minute (FIF! TEEN! What’s wrong with these people.) YouTube video? MENACE: the pile of matchboxes which can learn

Reading

Even though I don’t read as many books as I should or want – I mean, how? I have a day job and I need to read the internet and watch all of Netflix, not because I enjoy it but because of compuslion – I would identify myself as someone who really really likes reading. I mean, one of the reasons why I never properly learned how to interact with people is probably the fact that during the formative years for social behaviour (I’d say roughly between 12 and 22?) I usually was just sitting somewhere with a book.
And yet, I have never once thought about the fact that reading in silence is something weird(-ish) but it turns out: it is a pretty recent thing. History of reading: The beginning of silent reading changed humans’ interior life.

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So, yeah. Grab a book or something. Toodles!

Hello internet friends,

turns out, it is Monday Tuesday again and here we are. An email!
If you want to see ~the future~ let me introduce you to Replika, your new robot friend. Or how Wired would say it: What My Personal Chat Bot Is Teaching Me About AI’s Future
I tried it and it is creepy. (Can’t wait, to be honest.)

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Rent-A-Friend

If chat bots aren’t doing it for you and you’re still unable to attract people into interacting with you, here is something for you: How to Hire Fake Friends and Family
You’ll have to move to Japan first, though.

Apps!

Imagine for just a moment that the problem you have with apps on your phone is not that there are too many of them or that they spy on your every move or open up the door to random strangers to yell at you. Image instead that you might have not enough apps. Huh. For this situation there is an “App of the Day” thing going on at the iPhone app store and boy, is it wild: (for a very loose definition of “wild”) What I learned after downloading every iPhone App of the Day for a month

Happy Death

Important New Zealand news! A Country Created A Viral Vacationing “Swim Reaper” And People Love It
(In other New Zealand news: as far as I followed the news they’ve elected a pretty great new Prime Minister. But what’s that next to a grim reaper who enjoys the beach?)

Ads Ads Ads

I openly admit: I fell for this crap, too: A psychologist explains why those Facebook product ads are so darn compelling. Twice!
And let me tell you: the fancy scandinavian slippers are rather nice, but the shoes (from another company, but same contemporary conformist marketing) are… complicated.

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Toodles.
Sorry. Weird week. (And uhm, yeah… I told you about my newly acquired Terrace House addiction, right? Well… I’m now at this (rather low) point in my life where I download fan-subs of the first Japan-only iteration which I find in the weirder corner of the internet. This eats mightly into my “reading the internet” time. Again: sorry.)

Hello internet friends,

I’m in a mood today, so this is going to be fun!
First things first: let’s disable bloody bitcoin and maybe give boils to everybody who mentions cryptocurrencies or the blockchain. Deal? Deal.
I mean what the hell? One Bitcoin Transaction Now Uses as Much Energy as Your House in a Week

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Dead People News

Do you know what a muon is? Well, I didn’t know either, but apparently is helps to find voids: What we know about the mysterious chamber discovered inside the Great Pyramid
Before you click: the answer is “not all that much” – but now that I’ve spoiled it for you, you can still read the article to learn about muons.

Poop News

Luckily there are no bigger concerns on this planet than emoji. (Don’t @ me, bro.) So let’s spend some time Inside The Great Poop Emoji Feud! (Honestly, it is worth it just for the illustrations.)

Old People News

Remember a time before the internet? Welcome, you’re one of the olds. If you don’t – here’s What it feels like to be the last generation to remember life before the internet.
But then I’ve noticed lately that there are people around who are so young they don’t even [#RememberWebsites](http://tttthis.com/rememberwebsites.php/). I don’t know why this has to be a hashtag. Seriously. Anyway. People who do remember websites and are of the female persuasion do so because they learned about the internet from a browser game: ‘Neopets’: Inside Look at Early 2000s Internet Girl Culture.

Websites. I miss them.

Old Man News

There are not many old men who make me thing: Well, now that is a nice old man. He is one of them: Luke Skywalker Speaks

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That’d be it for tonight. Unless you want to learn about one man’s experiment with recipe boxes or how the rich tend to stay rich. Have a look at the most futuristic looking library so far or my first ever unboxing video. (Honestly, I almost lost it when I saw that. Good god.)

Anyway, have a nice week, really do. Toodles!

Hello internet friends,

let’s pour one out for the tool that changed everything for web developers a decade ago: Saying Goodbye to Firebug

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Slurp

Don’t we all know this situation? We’re sitting at our desk at the office during lunch break, silenty crying into our cup noodles, not daring to properly eat them in the way they’re supposed to be eaten because we’re too anxious about disturbing the other people around. But don’t give up, help is here! Japanese ramen-maker Nissin wants to end “noodle harassment” with a slurp-canceling fork

Pika Pika…

What do you do when you’re in 2017 and still very much invested in Ingress? Well, you think of ways to really dominate that game. And to win for your team you might need to go to great lengths: Inside Antarctica’s Illicit Gaming Scene

Clipper

In the early 40s of the last century Pan Am was flying all over the Pacific in huge flying boats. This all changed when the second world war also caught up with this part of the world – which was especially inconvenient for a plane that was on its way to New Zealand just as the war broke out. They had to go back The Long Way Round. (This reads like an old-fashioned adventure novel. Take your time with it.)

Future!

Or, these days: Retrofuture. It is not really en vogue anymore to use it, but it is still pretty great: The Suffix That Tells the Story of Modern Science

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That’s it for now, except if you want to read about One of the World’s Most Delicious Foods, anxious millennials or Dungeons & Dragons.

Toodles!

Hello internet friends,

this newsletter almost didn’t happen because I finally – and way too late – got sucked into the black hole that is Netflix’ Terrace House: the must-watch Japanese reality show in which nothing happens. And even after half a season I’m still not too sure How A Japanese Reality TV Show About Nothing Became A Global Hit.
Sorry.

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Uncle Licky

I’m not too sure I’ve mentioned the Licki Brush here before. Let it sink in for a while.
Now feel ashamed that you simple human are not able to properly lick another animal without an augmentation. Deers are so much better at it than we are: Why Is This Deer Licking This Fox?

Social Media

By now we’re all pretty much at a point where we know that all the Social Media is trash. (Yes, yes. Even what you and me are putting up there. Don’t deny it. We’re garbage people.) But now we even know it in numbers and it is pretty damning: What We Learned from Staring at Social Media Data for a Year

Woof

Talking about garbage people: (and no, don’t worry. I don’t actually think you’re a garbage person. You’re great!) Dogs can tell if you’re untrustworthy. Meanwhile they themselves are sneaky little buggers who have long since evolved their tricks to manipulate humans: Yes, your dog is making puppy eyes at you. At least not all of them are willing to work for the surveillance state or sell payroll solutions.

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That’s it for today. Unless you want to know how an Unknown local wins Venice marathon after favourites take wrong turn or Meet the Black Girls of Goth. Alternatively you might get a chuckle out of All the Awesome Pop Culture That’s Been Ruined by Horrible Fans, Ranked or the Garfield cartoon where Jon drinks dog semen. Or not. Maybe you’re interested to know why Russians are renting out grounded private jets by the hour or the meaning behind IKEA’s product names? It is pretty fascinating to learn Where Priests Get Their Clothes and how capitalism destroyed underground music for ever.
And once you’re done with all of this, you probably need this: Wirecutter Review: The Best Paper Towel for Mopping Up Tears

Toodles!

Hello internet friends,

did you go to the bathroom lately? Turns out this is a lot scarier in Japan.

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747

As the 747 Begins Its Final Approach, a Pilot Takes a Flight Down Memory Lane – this is a nice love letter to the most iconic airplane.

Cheerio

In 1973, I invented a ‘girly drink’ called Baileys – I’m not a big fan if his invention, but pour a bit over two scoops of really good vanilla gelato and we’re talking.

Housing

These are absolutely amazing: Singapore’s Metabolist Megastructures: the Asian City of Tomorrow?

Dioramas

I’ve never really wondered how criminologists learn their trade but now I am curious. Because at least in the 1940s some of them learned it this way: These Extraordinarily Detailed Dioramas Help Solve Murders

Nostalgia

Turns out we do quite like to read about these things that happened in the past for a reason: The science behind the internet’s unstoppable nostalgia addiction

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Toodles! (And let’s not think about Twitter too much. Even though this one is really, really good: One person’s history of Twitter, from beginning to end)